…wow… (old thoughts, but always amazing to think)

I don’t feel appreciated, or even VISIBLE (in a mom-and-dad-aren’t-there-for-me-and-it-feels-like-I-don’t-matter-(and-don’t-deserve-love, therefore” type of way

when people “like” me for something normal, average.

it feels too much like

they don’t mean what they are saying,
they don’t care,
they aren’t real,
they aren’t REALLY
SEEING/CARING about me.

I only seem to feel that it matters (and it may not even then, we shall see)
when people appreciate me for something DISTINCTIVE,
that is,

something individual, unique, DIFFERENT/WEIRD/CRAZY.

(some people might get that from being viewed as bad-boys, punks, skaters, etc…)

these thoughts were prodded by the notion that

the word “OBVI” is becoming shorthand for OBVIOUS, in a lame valleygirl speak way.

I was about to say:

“I don’t go in for these
TRENDY things” because:

see above.