the THOUHT of the day is:
it better be worth your effort in awesomeness.
if it’s not… even if it IS, to someone else…
don’t do it.
life’s too short.
when something is for fun…
it needs to ACTUALLY
being so afraid of feeling guilt and shame (a very bad habit indeed) that you DON’T take even the smallest risks, and effectively self-sabotage, even in passive aggressive ways (me?!) by simply taking something I am very good at, that being procrastinating, and doing it so long, that you “self-“ sabotage the opportunity.
cannot TELL you how many times I have done this,
how many years I have known about it, and how some kind teachers who cared, almost 20 years ago, tried to shake me out of it.
it seems I still have much to learn.
THIS is an answer, yes.
Not everything is supposed to be run like a business.
frankly, I think that applies to most businesses as well.
Care about more than just making money. please.
and by god, don’t define yourself in terms of how much money you make, your relationship to others, within a business, elsewhere, or to a business.
it’s interesting, being an individual who
1. didn’t really understand a lot of normalcy as a child.
2. still doesn’t.
3. wouldn’t and doesn’t choose said normalcy when given the choice.
4. didn’t and doesn’t feel the system was designed with him in mind.
5. doesn’t feel obligated in any way to present, TO ANYONE, ANY kind of AIR or APPEARANCE OF NORMALCY.
is it me, or are a great many
business people and such
that’s not really a question at all.
it’s my opinion.
it seems to me that very often, all such people care about is “mindlessly, UNCREATIVELY and UNCRITICALLY
COPYING what has come before, which in it’s original form was probably
1. a creative
2. risk-taking person.
Attachment leads to Jealousy.
The Shadow of Greed, That is…”
attachment to perfection, to what has come before.
do not be that way.
take fucking risks.
fail fucking miserably.
only them might you fucking fly.
(I didn’t mean to give offense in this post, I simply was a bit resentful when I wrote it. I simply wish businesspersons were in general more creative, and no, it wouldn’t be too bad if creative persons (like me) were more business saavy, somehow (sp.)
Oh, and they shouldn’t be so unimaginative and conformist and fearful and mundane. they should take far more chances and such. Basically, what I already said:)
when caring about being understood, indeed, when being understood, is less important than learning your craft.
I mean, think of a baby, or a child, or a creative adult or something.
a child isn’t concerned with whether anyone will care what it’s doing when it drops, say, a spoon. it’s interested in GRAVITY and HOW IT WORKS, and the results of it’s actions, not others.
-about music, and compromising and doing things in good enough ways, rather than the HONEST kind, where “I” am EXPERIMENTING, and LEARNING what doesn’t work and WHY….
why would I care to make things allegedly easy for typical people to understand?
why not indulge my curiosity and fancy?
if I cared about that, I’d just write boring block chords instead of TRYING things, to SEE what HAPPENS.
most uncreative, simply obedient.
why be that way?
I shall not, and am not.
(this was specifically about composing, music at that, and that there have been times when I have written chords “my” way, not the conventional way, or have orchestrated things in a way that seems interesting TO ME< NOW, and not in some “accepted” way.
I mean, really, why should I care if others “approve” of what I’m doing?
I’M BUSY “LEARNING” HERE!!!
don’t let others define you, they don’t have you in mind.
the difference in fantasy and reality…
concerns be a tad.
I just hope… that people don’t grow up, or go into something real, expecting it to be like their fantasy has been, be it a real relationship versus pornography, or actually being famous, versus what it “seems” like being famous much be like, or actually winning the lottery versus how wonderful the idea of millions of dollars “seems.”
make no mistake.
this is reality, right here, right now.
this is your mind, your feelings, your body.
get to know them good and make THEM feel and be good.
there is no “escape” to perfection.
you’re still you.
be a good you.
(there “are” exceptions; I wouldn’t want to be an a place in which I cannot concentrate versus one in which I can, nor a school full of cockroaches versus a clean one, but you get the point.)