being so afraid of feeling guilt and shame (a very bad habit indeed) that you DON’T take even the smallest risks, and effectively self-sabotage, even in passive aggressive ways (me?!) by simply taking something I am very good at, that being procrastinating, and doing it so long, that you “self-“ sabotage the opportunity.
cannot TELL you how many times I have done this,
how many years I have known about it, and how some kind teachers who cared, almost 20 years ago, tried to shake me out of it.
it seems I still have much to learn.
THIS is an answer, yes.