somehow tonight while playing music with some friends I managed to find myself playing
7 notes to the dotted quarter note, in 5/4.
meaning, when the guy playing in 5/4 (it was actually 5/16 (4 bars) against quarter notes (five of them of course)
meaning I played 14 notes every three quarter notes, so
YEAH, when the guy playing in 5/4 had played 3 bars, 15 quarter notes, 60 16th notes…
I had played 70 notes in the same space.
SIX AGAINST SEVEN, i.e, 3 against 3 and a half
WTF
fuck yeah
don’t be cynical.
don’t be realistic, god no.
Be Awesome, just Be Awesome.
find a way, don’t let norms and practicality get you down.
the hell with it.
fucking find a way.
don’t be cycnical, be awesome instead. you don’t owe cynics nothin’. you owe awesome things attempts to be awesome. you owe yourself this.
Just Be Awesome.
you don’t need to be loved by others,
nor by god.
but by YOURSELF.
“Goodness and Truth lie only in the Depths.”
-Wagner (the Rhinemaidens, actually.)
and yes, them other two things CAN HURT if you substitute em TOO much for that third (which is really the FIRST) thing.
people keep saying that people today are really selfish.
they are misusing the word selfish, grossly.
people today are focused on the approval of and attention from OTHERS.
that’s not selfish.
I mean, depending if you subscribe to “this” or “that” definition of the word, ok.
people should seek love and approval from THEMSELVES.
no amount of it from everyone else, the public, or god, yes,
will ever hold a candle to oneself.
you may think otherwise. go ahead.
I suppose an imaginary god is ok.
I suppose people are ok, but I tell you once again
“Goodness and Truth lie only in the Depths.”
-Wagner (the Rhinemaidens, actually.)
an attempt, not the first,
to create not a theory of everything, but of “some things”
involving analyzing
presenting one kind of thing as another, in the context of the former, or the latter, and which one is best…
is suddenly expanding, hopefully not unnecessarily into a discussion, within my brains,
of classical music,
ethnocentrism, white privilege, how in touch with the moment one or one’s culture is, and whether or not or one’s culture is alienated from the moment, from joy, and how important, if at all,
TELEOLOGY (goal-orientedness), LINEAR DEVELOPMENT in the western (music (and other things) sense is…, if at all…
why?
an attempt for
my extreme-left-brain (as always) pre-pre-pre planning to:
take something, a cultural (musical expression) which happens to be popular, but it most often lacks aspects of music that I really like…
and turn it into
1. something I like better
also
2. an attempt to take something I like and make it popular….
no small fuckin order….
I’ve only got “the rest of my life” to try to do it. :):):)
speaking of which:
(most everything in this post was cryptic for “very specific things.” ask me if you want.)
speaking of which:
I’m diggin the tune at 16:34, down the backstreets, in this:
sometimes I happen to like the raw materials of something (jazz, funk, my favorite harmonies of choice, etc.)
so in those cases, I don’t “mind” if what is “done with” them, FORM-wise, is TYPICAL, cause I like the material that is actually being used. (think of a guy who likes meatloaf (not me) who doesn’t care in what form meatloaf is presented in, nor how much, for it’s meatloaf and meatloaf is his thing.)
I’m trying to say two different things here… something tells me this is going to come across as rather incoherent… here goes.
other times,
I dislike very much the FORM, the way something is PRESENTED… it’s IMAGE, too.
I dislike it as ARBITRARY, and “kinda uncool and uninteresting.”
yes, raw materials liked by me could help this situation, but here’s another idea:
*I typed the end of this, anticipating what I’d say…. then came back and- can’t get my thoughts organized, and now they involve using “lower” (what’s lower?) art forms IN “higher ones” (what are “higher” ones, and could there BE a more “white/western-centric approach to ANYTHING…?
to be continued after I think about it
the end:
thus I agree with Beethoven from the end, which if I remember correctly (I do, and Thanks DR. RUBIO)
“CONTENT DETERMINES FORM.” (at least more so than it once did.
to do otherwise, is to agree with “no child left behind” and any other one-size-fits-all JIVE ASS CONFORMIST approach, which
IS.
NOT.
FUCKING.
OK.
it’s getting late.
we really need to do what the hell we want.
when we’re gone…. we won’t want anything no more, nor be able to do it.
let’s GO! let’s GO!!!!!
I’d not have written my jazz band arrangement, nor my marching arrangements, nor my percussion pieces in the way that I have, if I cared. how can I afford to care?
I care what I want, what I want to learn, and what happens when I do things a certain way, I don’t care for being liked to the extent that I purposefully learn what others have done that have worked.
why should I? such a thought hides “strong” anger within me, strong anger and resentment.
I like to do things MY way.
I don’t need your approval, your love. I have my own.
If I’m not to your taste, well then that is fine, I’m to someones taste, and to mine.
I love myself, and some others do and will love me too, and that’s enough.
when caring about being understood, indeed, when being understood, is less important than learning your craft.
I mean, think of a baby, or a child, or a creative adult or something.
a child isn’t concerned with whether anyone will care what it’s doing when it drops, say, a spoon. it’s interested in GRAVITY and HOW IT WORKS, and the results of it’s actions, not others.
-about music, and compromising and doing things in good enough ways, rather than the HONEST kind, where “I” am EXPERIMENTING, and LEARNING what doesn’t work and WHY….
why would I care to make things allegedly easy for typical people to understand?
why not indulge my curiosity and fancy?
if I cared about that, I’d just write boring block chords instead of TRYING things, to SEE what HAPPENS.
most uncreative, simply obedient.
why be that way?
I shall not, and am not.
(this was specifically about composing, music at that, and that there have been times when I have written chords “my” way, not the conventional way, or have orchestrated things in a way that seems interesting TO ME< NOW, and not in some “accepted” way.
I mean, really, why should I care if others “approve” of what I’m doing?
I’M BUSY “LEARNING” HERE!!!
I don’t really have people from “normal life” who wonder what my music stuff is about.
music IS the life, and the world.
I’m not part of some other normal world,
with music on the side.
which is nice.
I guess.(no, it is.):)
don’t let others define you, they don’t have you in mind.
the difference in fantasy and reality…
concerns be a tad.
I just hope… that people don’t grow up, or go into something real, expecting it to be like their fantasy has been, be it a real relationship versus pornography, or actually being famous, versus what it “seems” like being famous much be like, or actually winning the lottery versus how wonderful the idea of millions of dollars “seems.”
make no mistake.
this is reality, right here, right now.
this is your mind, your feelings, your body.
get to know them good and make THEM feel and be good.
there is no “escape” to perfection.
you’re still you.
be a good you.
(there “are” exceptions; I wouldn’t want to be an a place in which I cannot concentrate versus one in which I can, nor a school full of cockroaches versus a clean one, but you get the point.)